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Self-Esteem & Effective Communication Skills
Your communication style can alter the way people perceive you, either increasing or decreasing your opportunities for employment, romance and friends. People with high self-esteem tend to have better communication skills 23. People with low self-esteem may struggle with communication, making it difficult for them to develop strong relationships and further lowering their self-esteem.
Assertive Communication
Assertive communication is the ability to clearly express your needs in a way that is neither excessively aggressive nor unduly conciliatory. Assertive people have better luck negotiating job terms, communicating needs to their partners and managing conflict. However, low self-esteem can undermine assertive communication, according to East Bay Counseling Choices 3. This can cause people who already struggle with their self-esteem to get fewer needs met, potentially lowering their self-esteem even more.
- Assertive communication is the ability to clearly express your needs in a way that is neither excessively aggressive nor unduly conciliatory.
- However, low self-esteem can undermine assertive communication, according to East Bay Counseling Choices 3.
Friendliness and Extraversion
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According to a 2001 study published in the "Journal of Research in Personality," extroverted people tend to have higher self-esteem. Extraversion can make it easier for people to approach strangers, talk in large groups and appear friendly. This can cause others to perceive extroverts more positively, potentially further boosting their self-esteem. People with low self-esteem may be anxious about talking to unfamiliar people and more uncomfortable in group settings.
- According to a 2001 study published in the "Journal of Research in Personality," extroverted people tend to have higher self-esteem.
- This can cause others to perceive extroverts more positively, potentially further boosting their self-esteem.
Body Language
According to a 2010 study published in "Obesity Facts," self-esteem can play a role in body language. The study found that obese women with low self-esteem were more likely to exhibit "closed" body language, providing less information to observers via their physical communication. Closed body language includes crossing your arms or "guarding" your body by hunching over to make yourself appear smaller and less assuming. People who struggle with low self-esteem may exhibit anxious or inappropriate body language that can alter how others perceive them. They may struggle with eye contact, fidget during conversation, or indulge in nervous habits such as nail-biting.
- According to a 2010 study published in "Obesity Facts," self-esteem can play a role in body language.
- People who struggle with low self-esteem may exhibit anxious or inappropriate body language that can alter how others perceive them.
Internet Communication
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Internet communication is an increasingly important part of work and social life. According to a 2005 study published in "CyberPsychology and Behavior," people with low self-esteem are more likely to misrepresent themselves online. Another study, published in the "Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication" in 2008, found that some people with low self-esteem use the Internet as a way to compensate. These people may try to become "popular" online, which means the Internet can help serve as an alternative communication channel for people who struggle with in-person communication.
- Internet communication is an increasingly important part of work and social life.
- Another study, published in the "Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication" in 2008, found that some people with low self-esteem use the Internet as a way to compensate.
Related Articles
References
- CyberPsychology and Behavior: Liar, Liar: Internet Faking but Not Frequency of Use Affects Social Skills, Self-Esteem, Social Anxiety, and Aggression
- Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication: The Faces of Facebookers: Investigating Social Enhancement and Social Compensation Hypotheses; Predicting Facebook and Offline Popularity From Sociability and Self-Esteem, and Mapping the Meanings of Popularity With Semantic Networks
- Obesity Facts: Perceived Discrimination and Stigmatisation Against Severely Obese Women: Age and Weight Loss Make a Difference
- Kunc, N. (1992). The Need to Belong: Rediscovering Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. In R. A. Villa, J. S. Thousand, W. Stainback, & S. Stainback (Eds.), Restructuring for caring and effective education: An administrative guide to creating heterogeneous schools (pp. 25-39). Baltimore, MD, England: Paul H. Brookes Publishing.
- Crocker J, Major B. Social stigma and self-esteem: The self-protective properties of stigma. Psychological Review. 1989;(4):608-630. doi:10.1037/0033-295X.96.4.608
- Mayo Clinic. Self-Esteem Check: Too Low or Just Right? July 12, 2017.
- Maslow, AH. Motivation and Personality. 3rd ed. New York: Harper & Row; 1987.
Writer Bio
Van Thompson is an attorney and writer. A former martial arts instructor, he holds bachelor's degrees in music and computer science from Westchester University, and a juris doctor from Georgia State University. He is the recipient of numerous writing awards, including a 2009 CALI Legal Writing Award.