How to Build Self Esteem

By Contributor

These tips should help anyone who is struggling to maintain a healthy attitude of self love and good self esteem. Remember to always love yourself and love others as you love yourself. Try not to be so harsh or judgmental on yourself or others.

Adopt a new, more positive attitude. Accept yourself for who you are and love yourself for who you are. Tell yourself "I love you" in the mirror everyday and smile. Spend some time on yourself and your special attributes. Everyone is good at something or enjoys something. What do you like? Do you like art, music, history, making things, movies? Whatever it is you like, begin doing it, even if it's just a hobby for an hour or two a week. It will make you feel better about yourself and it will help build up your self esteem to know that you are doing something that you enjoy.

Surround yourself with other people who lift you up and are positive. Talk to and hang out with friends and family. Make new friends and find people who love you and genuinely care about you and accept you for who you are and only want the best for you. Choose your friends carefully. Be aware of people who can drag you down or make you feel bad about yourself.

Get to know yourself. What are your values, your beliefs, your morals, your wants, your needs and your taste? The better you know yourself, the easier it will be to love yourself.

Stop trying to be perfect. Perfectionism is a double edged sword. You cannot be perfect, you can only be the best you, you can be. No one in this world is perfect, so don't berate yourself or tear yourself down for making a mistake or not being perfect. Also, stop comparing yourself to others. You will never be them and they will never be you. Others are not perfect and although it may seem to you that they are, if you would really get to know them and see their life as it truly is, you would realize that not one single person on the face of the planet isn't struggling constantly or hasn't been through some struggles in life.

Be kind to others and do nice things for other people. This will help to build your self esteem. This is what can truly make people happy. You will realize that by you making other people happy, you yourself will become happy or happier with your life and yourself. There is no better thing in the world you can do than be good and do good for others.

Always remember that you are a worthy person. You are worthy of love and don't let no one, including yourself, tell you otherwise, because it is a lie. Do not devalue yourself or your life; you matter, even if you or others think otherwise. Know that you are loved unconditionally by not only other people, but by God or some "higher power". Just knowing that someone out there cares is enough to help boost your self esteem. Learn over time how to love yourself and forgive yourself for beating yourself up. Never, ever, ever give up.


Find a support group of friends, family or a local group where you can talk to others who may have the same feelings and thoughts. When you're feeling down, do something that you enjoy or love, go for a walk, relax and take a bath or go out with a friend.


If you are in distress and/or considering hurting yourself call for help. Make a call for help, whether it be to a friend, family member or a 1-800 hotline. Hurting yourself will not make anything better, try to stay as positive as you can be and know that good things will come your way.

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