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How to Help Your Teen Over a Break Up

By Laine Doss ; Updated June 13, 2017

Watching your teen go through the hurt over a breakup can be worse for a parent than going through one firsthand. Your teen might be feeling hurt, inadequate, unloved or despondent. While you can't change what happened or make the pain go away, there are some things you can do to let your teen know that she's not alone and that you're there for her.

Help Your Teen Get Over a Breakup

Let your teen know that you're there for him, but don't be too pushy. Your teen might feel embarrassed about talking to you about his relationship and the details of the breakup. Encourage him to write his feelings in a journal.

Sit your teen down and show him some old pictures of yourself before you were born. Tell him what happened to your high school sweetheart. Let him know how hurt and devastated you were when it happened to you. Make no judgments and don't make light of the situation. Simply state that while the breakup hurt, you were eventually able to move on and love again.

Encourage your teen to get out of the house and try a new activity. Enroll her in a jewelry-making class or kayak team. Find a project that you can both volunteer for like walking dogs at the local animal shelter or building a house for Habitat for Humanity. The more activities they're busy with, the less time they have to rehash the old wounds.

Make your teen feel attractive by treating her to a new haircut or a spa day. A day out shopping for a new outfit might be just the thing to make your teen feel good.

Respect your teen and give him space. Teen boys might become introverted or angry. As long as the anger isn't focused on you, allow him to have his emotions.

Tips

Allow your teen to have space but always let your teen know you are available whenever they want to talk. By making yourself available, your teen might take you up on the offer when you least expect it.

Warnings

Be aware of any warning signs that your teen is not handling the breakup well. There is a difference between your teen feeling "blue" and being depressed. If your teen shows signs of drinking, drug use, depression or inappropriate behavior, such as intense anger or excessive sleeping, get her professional help immediately.

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